Speech guides › Father of the bride

How to write a father of the bride speech

The father of the bride speech often opens the speeches, which means you set the tone for the evening. It's less about jokes and more about pride: who your daughter is, who she's become, and the person she's chosen.

What the father of the bride traditionally covers

  1. Welcome and thanks. Thank guests for coming, especially those who travelled, and acknowledge the other family.
  2. Remember absent loved ones. A brief, gentle mention of anyone who couldn't be there. One or two sentences — don't let it dominate.
  3. Her story. A memory or two from her childhood that still says something about her today.
  4. Welcome the partner. Say what you've come to admire about them, and welcome them (and their family) into yours.
  5. The toast. To the couple, by name.

How long?

Four to six minutes, or about 550 to 750 words. You have a little more licence than the best man, but not much.

Tips

  • Pick one childhood story rather than a life history. "When she was seven…" is a powerful opening.
  • Avoid giving marriage advice unless it's short, kind and genuinely yours.
  • Look at your daughter when you say the most important line.
  • If it's not traditional for you to pay for the wedding, skip the jokes about cost entirely.

Example opening

Good evening, everyone. On behalf of Linda and myself, thank you for being here — some of you have flown halfway around the world, and it means more than we can say.

When Emma was six, she announced she was going to build a treehouse. She had no wood, no tools, and no tree. Three weeks later, she had all three, and I had a much smaller savings account. That determination has never left her…

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Frequently asked questions

Does the father of the bride speak first?

Traditionally, yes — he usually opens the speeches as host. Many couples now change the order.

What if I'm a stepfather?

Speak about your own relationship with her honestly. There's no need to explain the family history to the room.

Should I mention the bride's mother?

Yes — a warm acknowledgement of her mother, whether present or not, is usually appreciated. Ask your daughter if you're unsure.